Summary of meeting on Forgiveness on Sept. 2nd, 2017
On Saturday the 2nd September we met to think about the subject of forgiveness under the guidance of Rob.
After a very moving, personal and thought provoking introduction by Rob who among other things spoke about how his life had changed after meeting MPHO TUTU and subsequently reading the book she had written with her father, The book of Forgiving, we divided into groups for reflection and discussion.
The discussions centred around Desmond and Mpho’s offer of a fourfold path leading to forgiveness freeing one from a cycle of hurt and retribution. It would appear from the feedback that each group took a different approach to the subject and again much of the revelations were personal. Some gained an awful lot from this session but others were perhaps reticent and gained little. Some did not enjoy it, but for most I think went away with a lot to think about. For those who had read the book reactions were similar.
Some of the points do bear further reflection and heart searching. They included the necessity of trying to understand another’s point of view, acknowledging fault on both sides
The difference if there is one is between forgiveness and acceptance.
The role of God and the question as to whether there is a difference in the Christian understanding of forgiveness and the humanistic one. Do we forgive and/or are forgiven by the grace of God?
As ChristianOs do we go beyond the psychological.
The importance of forgiving oneself.
The four steps are as follows
1, Telling the story, relating what has happened
2, Naming the hurt, describing our hurt
3, Granting forgiveness sincerely from the heart and therefore gaining a sense of freedom
4, Renewing or Releasing the Relationship, creating a new relationship out of our suffering. We do not go back.
Thank you Rob.